A Guide For Sponsers On NFL Practice Jerseys


Just when you thought you couldn’t see any more advertisements in the NFL, some teams such as the Broncos and Packers are considering placing ads on practice jerseys. If all teams do this in the future (which I see happening), these sponsorships should be used for the jerseys of these NFL players:

Brett Favre: “Aricept” the drug that slows the progression of Alzheimer’s Disease would best be suited on Favre’s jersey. He keeps forgetting that he enters retirement as soon as the season ends only to come back the following year.

Chad Ochocinco: “Travelocity” belongs on his jersey. Always looking for a way out of town, and any reason not to attend off season workouts, Ochocinco needs a vaca.

Jeremy Shockey: “Gatorade” or “Jose Cuervo” depending on your perspective. After being found unconscious outside of a Las Vegas pool party, Shockey was taken to a local hospital on a stretcher after suffering a bout of “dehydration.” 

Michael Vick: “ASPCA.” That’s an easy one.

“Plaxico Burress: “GunLocker.com”  I heard from the nightclub owners that he was in fact shooting at the Chiefs running back Larry Johnson who had just spit a drink in his face, but Pac Man Jones slapped the gun down at the last second. Hmm… either way, dude needs to leave his gun at home.

 Albert Haynesworth: “U.S. Mint Tours.” Sure, the U.S. Mint doesn’t need to advertise, but they should since the $100 million man just went to the biggest city where money is made.

Jay Cutler: “Verizon Wireless.” Mr. Out of Touch needs a better connection to reach his new coach.

Maretellus Bennett: “Cap N Crunch.” This Cowboy steers away from the traditional Texas breakfast of  biscuits and gravy and goes straight for the crunch. Watch.  

Jason Taylor: “FedEx.” This Dolphin was quickly shipped back to Miami after a short stint in D.C.  “When it absolutely positively has to get there overnight.”

All of the New York Jets and Giants: “Lebron James In BKLYN.” What New Yorker doesn’t want to see the King play in the county of Kings?

Travis Henry : “Trojan Condoms” on the front of a jailbird jersey. This dude has 9 kids with 9 women and claims he’s broke. He could educate some people.